Grandparent Scam: How It Works and How to Protect Your Parent

A grandparent scam is a phone call from someone pretending to be a grandchild (or you) in trouble, usually arrested or in a car accident, who needs money fast and begs your parent not to tell the family. A second scammer often comes on the line as a lawyer or police officer, and the money goes out by wire, gift card, cash in the mail, cryptocurrency, or a courier who comes to the house. The best protection is a rule your parent has heard from you ahead of time: any call that asks for money and secrecy gets hung up on, and then they call someone in the family on a number they already have.

If it already happened, skip to what to do after your parent has paid. Speed matters more than anything else on that list.

How the call usually goes

The details change, but the FBI, the FTC and state attorneys general describe the same basic sequence.

1. The phone rings, sometimes in the middle of the night. The New York Attorney General's office points out that scammers call when people are groggy and already expecting bad news at that hour.
2. "Grandma, it's me." The caller doesn't always give a name. Michigan's Attorney General notes that many grandparents fill in the name themselves ("Is that you, Mike?"), and from then on the scammer is Mike.
3. An excuse for the voice. The "grandchild" may speak softly, cry, or blame a bad connection. According to the FTC, some scammers now use a short audio clip and a voice-cloning program so the caller sounds just like the real person.
4. The emergency. Arrest, car accident, a medical problem while traveling. In a 2023 warning, the FBI described a version where the grandchild is in jail after a car crash that involved a diplomat or a pregnant woman, which raises the stakes.
5. The second voice. A "lawyer," police officer, doctor or bail bondsman takes over. This person sounds calm and official, and gives the payment instructions.
6. The secret. "Please don't tell Mom." Or a claim that a judge has issued a gag order, and telling anyone will send the grandchild to jail or bring more fines.
7. The payment instructions. Specific, unusual and urgent: go to the bank, withdraw cash, and wait for someone to come get it. Or buy gift cards and read off the numbers.
8. The second ask. Once money changes hands, the calls keep coming. The FBI says scammers may ask for more because the injured person got worse or someone died. The FTC says a parent who paid a courier may then be asked to wire money or mail it.

Families rarely hear about that last step. Paying once can bring more calls, not fewer.

How do they know so much?

Often from what families post. The FTC says scammers may already know names, where your parent lives and other details from social media or a hacked family email account, and sometimes they simply guess. Michigan's alert gives a sharp example: a grandchild posts about an upcoming trip, and the "I'm in trouble while traveling" call follows.

Caller ID won't settle it either. The FBI warns that scammers can disguise the number they're calling from so it looks familiar.

How the money moves

Every version ends with a payment method that, as the FTC puts it, makes it tough to get your money back.

The magazine detail is the FBI's: victims have been told to mail cash packaged in magazines or books.

The courier at the door

The FBI warned in 2021 that grandparent scammers were sending couriers to collect bail money at the victim's home, sometimes using ride share drivers. From January 2020 through June 2021, IC3 received over 650 reports of potential grandparent scams with more than $13 million in losses, and over 90 of those victims said the money was picked up from their home.

The driver who shows up may have no idea what's in the envelope. The FBI's 2023 warning calls these couriers "witting or unwitting," and the FTC notes that once your parent hands the cash over, the money is gone. So the courier seeming nice proves nothing. A pleasant young man in a hatchback is exactly what this looks like.

Red flags your parent can learn in five minutes

Any one of these is enough to hang up and check:

• The caller says "It's me" and waits for a name
• The voice sounds off, with an excuse ready (crying, a bad line, a noisy place)
• There's a second person, a lawyer or officer, who handles the money part
• Anyone asks them to keep it from the rest of the family, for any reason
• The words "gag order" come up
• They're told to pay with gift cards, cash, a wire, crypto or a payment app
• Someone offers to send a courier to the house
• The amount grows after the first payment

The secrecy flag is the one to drill. The FTC says scammers insist on keeping it secret because they don't want you talking to other family members and realizing it's a scam. A real grandchild in real trouble wants their family told.

How big the problem is

The FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) counts the grandparent scam inside a broader category called confidence/romance fraud, so there's no clean national total for this one scam. The surrounding numbers still tell you something.

• People 60 and older reported $4.885 billion in losses to IC3 in 2024, from 147,127 complaints across every type of crime IC3 tracks.
• In 2025 that rose to $7.748 billion, from 201,266 complaints by people 60 and older, according to IC3's 2025 annual report.
• That same report says victims claimed over $5 million in losses in 2025 to "distress" scams that used voice cloning to mimic a loved one, and that the scam is evolving to mimic other family members and close friends.
• From January through September 2023, IC3 received more than 195 complaints about grandparent scams, with at least $1.9 million lost, per the FBI's 2023 warning.

These are only reported cases. The New York Attorney General's brochure notes that scammers count on people being too embarrassed to report. Keep that in mind when you bring it up with your parent.

How to prepare your parent before the call comes

A single warning fades. A few plain rules your parent has heard from you more than once, written down where they can see them, tend to stick.

Give them permission to break the secret

This is the big one, and it costs nothing. Tell your parent, in so many words, that they will never get in trouble for checking. The New York Attorney General suggests giving grandparents the OK to always check with other family members about where someone is. Then have your kids say it too, because the call usually claims to be from them.

"Mom, if Jake ever calls saying he's in jail and begging you not to tell me, tell me anyway. He'll be fine. I promise nobody will be mad."

A grandparent who has heard that from the grandchild in question is a much harder sell.

Hang up and call back on a number they already have

The FTC's advice is to use a phone number you know is right to reach the family member who supposedly called, and if you can't reach them, call someone else in the family, even if the caller said to keep it secret.

At 2 a.m., your parent may not remember which grandchild has which cell number, so write a short call-back list and put it next to the phone they actually use:

• Each grandchild's cell, and a parent of each grandchild
• Your cell and one sibling's
• A neighbor or friend who can come over
• The bank's fraud number, from the back of the debit card

Put the same numbers in the cell phone as named contacts, so a call from "Jake" on caller ID is a call your parent can return.

Agree on a family code word

A question only the real person can answer, or a word the whole family agrees on, gives your parent a second check when they can't get off the phone. The FTC suggests a question like "What kind of dog do you have?" A code word takes a little more thought than it sounds, especially now that a cloned voice can sound exactly right, so we wrote a separate guide on choosing and practicing a family safe word.

Settle the door rule and the bank rule

Two short rules cover most of the payment tricks:

• No money goes to anyone who comes to the house. In a warning about cash couriers, the FBI advises never giving out your home address or agreeing to meet strangers to hand over cash.
• No paying by gift card, wire, crypto ATM or mailed cash for a family emergency. The FTC is blunt that anyone who asks for payment by gift card or money transfer is a scammer, always.

If your parent is open to it, bank alerts sent to you for large withdrawals add a quiet safety net. Our guide to organizing an elderly parent's bills covers which alerts and withdrawal limits to ask the bank about.

Practice it once

A rule your parent has said out loud is easier to use under stress. Pick a calm afternoon and play it out: you're the "grandson," then the "lawyer." Let them practice saying, "I'm going to hang up and call you right back." It feels silly for about a minute.

Ask the family to tighten what they post

The FBI suggests limiting what you post on social media because scammers use it to build a convincing story. That's mostly a job for the grandkids: public travel posts, tagged locations, and videos with clear voice audio are the raw material.

If the call is happening right now

If your parent calls you mid-scam, or a sibling is with them and something feels wrong:

1. Get your parent off the call. "I'll call you back" is enough. They don't owe the caller an explanation.
2. Reach the person who supposedly called, on their real number. If you can't, reach their parent or partner.
3. If a courier is on the way, your parent should not open the door or hand anything over. Call local police and tell them a scam pickup is coming.
4. If money is already in motion (a wire sent, gift cards bought, a package dropped off), move straight to the next section.

What to do after your parent has paid

It happens to careful, smart people. Scammers do this all day; your parent did it once, while frightened. The first hour is about money, not blame.

Step 1: Call whoever moved the money

The FTC says that no matter how your parent paid, the sooner you act, the better. Who to call depends on how it was paid:

The table follows the FTC's page on what to do if you were scammed. A few practical notes from the same page:

• Keep the gift cards and receipts. The FTC says your parent may need them to follow up on the claim. Its gift card scam page also suggests taking a picture of both with your phone.
• The USPS intercept costs a fee and only works on a domestic package that hasn't been delivered yet. Call fast.

Cash handed to a courier is the hardest case, since there's no company to call. Report it anyway. The time of the pickup, a description of the person and the car, and any plate number are all worth giving police.

Step 2: File a police report

The FTC is direct about this: if your parent lost money to a grandparent scam, it was a crime, so file a report with local law enforcement. Write down the report number.

Step 3: Report to the FBI's IC3

File at ic3.gov. In its warning about courier scams, the FBI asks victims to report as quickly as possible with as much transaction detail as they can. Before you start, gather:

• Names the callers used, and who they said they were
• Every phone number that called, with dates and times
• How much was paid, how, and when
• Gift card numbers, wire receipt numbers, crypto transaction details, or tracking numbers
• Any account numbers or names the money was sent to
• A description of anyone who came to the door, and the car

Step 4: Report to the FTC and your state attorney general

Report at ReportFraud.ftc.gov. The FTC also suggests reporting to your state attorney general. The New York AG's office urges people to report even when no money was sent, since tracking how the scam is run helps prevent it.

Step 5: Call the National Elder Fraud Hotline

The Justice Department's Office for Victims of Crime runs a free National Elder Fraud Hotline for fraud against anyone 60 or older: 833-FRAUD-11 (833-372-8311). A case manager helps with reporting at the federal, state and local levels and stays your point of contact. Its site lists hours as Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Eastern, with English, Spanish and other languages available.

Step 6: Watch for the follow-up scam

Your parent is now on someone's list. The FTC says scammers buy and trade lists of people who've already paid, then call back offering to recover the lost money for a fee. Government agencies and legitimate organizations never ask for money to help get a refund. Anyone who wants an upfront fee, or your parent's account numbers, to "get the money back" is running the next scam.

Expect more calls, possibly from the same "lawyer."

Step 7: Talk about it without blame

Your parent is probably embarrassed, and embarrassed people stop telling you things. Thank them for telling you, and keep the focus on the people who did this. If money talks with your parent tend to go sideways, our guide on talking to aging parents about finances has scripts that help.

Frequently asked questions

Can my parent get their money back after a grandparent scam?

Sometimes, especially if they act fast. The FTC says to contact the company used to send the money right away: the bank, wire company, gift card issuer or crypto ATM operator. Mailed cash may be intercepted through the Postal Inspection Service for a fee. Cash handed to a courier is the hardest to recover.

Where do I report a grandparent scam?

Local police, the FBI at ic3.gov, the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov, and your state attorney general. For a victim 60 or older, the National Elder Fraud Hotline at 833-FRAUD-11 can help with the reporting.

Why do scammers tell grandparents to keep it a secret?

Because one call to another family member can end the scam. Any request for secrecy about money is a reason to call the family.

Can scammers really copy a grandchild's voice?

Yes. The FTC says a scammer can use a short audio clip and a voice-cloning program to sound like a family member, and IC3's 2025 report describes distress scams using cloned voices. A familiar voice isn't proof, which is why calling back on a known number works better than listening harder.

Put the plan where your parent can find it

What actually protects your parent is plain and unglamorous: a call-back list by the phone, a rule about secrets, a rule about the door, and the family's real numbers written down. You can make all of that yourself from this page and a sheet of paper.

Or Emergency Binder Now can do the organizing: about 25 minutes of guided questions produces a printable binder for your parent, with emergency contacts, doctors and pharmacy, and where the important documents are kept. The optional Family Scam Shield Kit adds a family safe-word plan, call-back rules with your parent's real bank numbers, and a "stop before you send money" sheet for the fridge. You can see a sample binder first.

This article is general information, not legal or financial advice. Recovery options depend on the payment method, the company involved and your state. For help with a specific case, contact local police, the National Elder Fraud Hotline, or an attorney.